Realization. Priorities.

This last week, this first week of the year….has been amazing! And it is so painfully obvious why….

My goals have been at the front of my mind. And I’ve been doing them. In my “free time”, I have been doing things I actually enjoy and care about, as opposed to doing some cop-out-I-just-want-to-lay-here-and-not-function-for-as-long-as-possible….. I haven’t allowed myself to get caught up in the difficulties of being a home keeper and mother. Or the ease of letting my brain unwind while watching one (ahem…two…three….) episodes of Alias (recent addiction, thanks to Amazon Prime…)….

The craziest part…I have been energetic. And I have been going to bed at about 2am every night in order to do it all….

The magical solution to all of my life problems? Putting my Faith First and prioritizing my priorities!

Some of you may be reading this with one eyebrow raised because of the obviousness (I’m lookin at you General Conference speakers)….but I am so happy to have finally taken this “life secret” to heart! I can surely say I will think twice before skipping out on meaningful prayers and concentrated scripture study. And something that really sets me free--- journal writing. My chance to calm down and reflect on what the day was really about. The moments had, the lessons learned. Pondering in what way it can all be done better, or even repeated the next day.

And after the kids go to bed, writing in my book, learning new songs on the guitar, working on many other new year goal I made, using my talents, it is the most fulfilling thing next to being a mother and a wife. 

Besides priorities, I think its really helps me a lot putting my thoughts out there for the world to see, things I can’t back down from, not once I’ve committed to them in front of the world (or to ya know, the world as far as this blog and the small # of people that read it! Yay for you!).

When I say I’ve put my priorities first, that in no way means I’ve put my children or duties as a mother second. It means that somehow, when I balance everything the way it should be balanced, everything else just falls into place….its like…my daily clock has slowed down, allowing me to squeeze more into it…

But I’m not talking about squeezing more into it in a way that I’m pushing myself too far. I mean. I’ve had so much more quality time with my family. Its because when I’m playing with them, I’m present. My mind isn’t wondering when I’m possibly going to find the time to do things I know I need for self progression.

And at the “end of the day”, when little bodies are bathed, snuggled, and tucked in tight…. when the evidence of imaginative, magic-believing little people’s playfulness has been cleaned up and stored for tomorrows adventures…. when spilled milk has been wiped up and thrown pieces of bread taken away from the impending threat of ants…… I have still had time do these things.

You know that feeling you get sometimes (or for some of us, all the time) when you feel guilt at the end of the day for the things you didn’t accomplish, even when you were crazy busy all day? But maybe you didn’t pick the right things to be crazy busy with or didn’t do them efficiently enough? But really, maybe you’r daily clock can’t slow down because all you can think about it the things you wish you had more time to do ….. Were you really PRESENT for the most precious people in your life???

I haven’t had that at all this week.

Its magical, and I have no intention of letting it fade.

Somehow in my letting the “things that make my soul sing” slip by the wayside, these pictures never saw the light of day! Taken by me dear and talented friend Lori over a year ago! Look at my babies!!

Noon Years Eve & Resolutions

We went to a super fun party at a community library nearby called “Noon Years Eve” (am I the only one bothered by the nonsensicality of the name? And is nonsensicality even a word?!) Well let me tell you, little kids know how to party! It did get pretty crazy at the countdown to noon and the balloon drop…I lost sight of my 3 year old for an extended period of time, and my smaller child was clutching my body in fear of all of the noisemakers and kids going crazy trying to grab balloons and stomping on bubble wrap. But amidst all of the fair type games and fun crafts and fun music, my mommy friend and I realized, this is as party as new years eve is going to get for us mommies! Downing half filled cups of sprite and shaking rice-filled-cups-taped-together noisemakers as we count down to mid-day at the library. I do love the life of a momma! I’m glad we were able to do something to help our little kids capture the excitement of a New Year.

^^^Urban’s favorite little buddy^^^

I don’t usually make resolutions at New Years, because I’ve always thought, shouldn’t I be thinking of ways to be better like….always? I’m working on things to make myself a better person always. But, I never really give myself deadlines, or set measurable goals. And its occurred to me, this is kind of cool. The entire rest of the world (mostly…I assume…I guess…), is alive with energy to be better, to try harder, for a bright NEW YEAR, with hope, for love, believing in a better world if only the people occupying this planet can be better. And I was thinking that I’d like to add to that energy, and you know, 365 days is a good “check in” plan. Concrete. So I’ll keep my non concrete goals coming and going throughout the year, and I want to set a few concrete goals for this one year. Measurable goals with a deadline.

So I’m going to be crazy, really put myself out there, and post these for the world to see and hold me to. If anybody else out there is doing one of these too, let me know and we can bug each other about them!

My 2014 New Years Resolutions

AKA - my measurable goals that I am setting a deadline for (vs. my day-to-day non measurable goals that are ongoing…like…ya know…be more patient when Atlas is disobedient, assume the best in people, fight my negative inner voice with optimism...etc., etc…. Ongoing goals.)

Read the entire Book of Mormon
Read the scriptures and write in my journal every day
Conquer at least one thing I have previously failed at
Do a public musical performance at least once this year
Write 100 pages in my book
Give yoga a real chance
A House of Order: “a place for everything and everything in its place” –> Get there
Put together 3 months of food storage
Get back on the Real Food wagon
Be more thoughtful about the movies/music Urban takes in

And then Mike and I have a few goals together as well, as a family, that helps us progress together and feel unified.

And I could talk your face off about each individual goal on my list here and what it means to me and my plans to fulfilling it, and I can also almost promise you that I will, one by one throughout the year, talk your face off about them. That’s the great thing about having a blog and feeling like I can be open about voicing these things….if anybody is bored or bothered by what I say, they don’t have to read it! Yay! Which means that it means even more to me that whoever out there that is reading any of my ramblings cares at all :-).

I am so excited for 2014!!!

P.S. I see goals and resolutions as a plan to not regret the way we spent this life. To not feel like we were sleep walking, passively letting life pass us by. Here is one of my very favorite people talking about living a life with no regrets.

P.P.S…..today Atlas insisted on writing a letter to Santa Claus (his writing is scribbling, pretending he’s writing). It read: “Dear Santa Claus, did you have a good day doing Christmas?”

Our Family Picture/Christmas Card

I hope you all had the Merriest Christmas! I never thought I would be so cliché as to grow up and start saying phrases such as

“I can’t believe Christmas is already over”
“Is it really already the end of December!?”
“It goes by so fast!”
”Its over in the blink of an eye!”

…yet it seems these days that these phrases are all that comes out of my mouth! Sheesh. Seriously though… (cliché coming….) WHERE does the time go?! Well this Christmas season I can say that the time did not disappear into meaningless day to day activities while we waited for the big Christmas day to come. We had a wonderful December. And I think I can attribute that mostly to my advent calendar. It was such a Festive, Christ centered, exciting, sugary, way to start every day this month and I’m so glad I finally buckled down and made it. I did a huge post about it because I really felt that it was going to be the clincher for me to feel like I didn’t miss out on a month that seems to be stuck on fast forward. I didn’t get to do nearly as much as I had planned due to sickness and you know, life happening…

…but it feels so good to look back on a certain time like this, and say to myself, I’m happy with how I spent my time.

p.s.I've decided to try and make this a tradition, to take a family picture in this green chair on Thanksgiving day. Here is last years. When I posted that, my friend Megan jokingly said that she dared us to take that same picture in 20 years...well...yeah! Great idea! 

Christ, Making Memories, And Yummy Fun

I am far from crafty, but it seems that every once in a while I succeed with something that I’ve been dying to do for years. This is one of those times, and I am so thrilled with how my advent calendar turned out!
Being something I’ve put so much thought into, and since I had such a difficult time balancing fun, Christ centered, and age appropriateness, I am going to share exactly what I did so that anyone else out there might have an easier time if they are anything like me in their expectations for an advent calendar, and like me, are having a hard time finding something just like it on the internet (proud much here???). Bonus for you if you live in the Austin area…I’ve already hunted down all of the fun local stuff! Let me know if you know of something you think we’d enjoy that I don’t have listed here!

Primary function: Introduce my children to the true Spirit of Christmas, to plant a desire in them to center their hearts on Christ & Charity….

Which in my opinion is already so strong and innate in a child, it is their natural disposition towards life as long as we, ruined adults, don’t spoil it.

Therefore, I will strive to encourage this disposition of charity and Christ-like love, to nurture it to grow strong, as one might nurture a seed, it might still grow even if one neglects it, but to ensure it grows, and to ensure it grows strong, it needs love and specialized attention. 

The Calendar:

After sorting through probably hundreds of ideas throughout the web, I decided to do my own thing, something that:
A. Wouldn’t stress me out
B. Would be more than just candy
C. Would be only as expensive as the candy and the activities themselves cost
D. Would be a good mix of Christ centered Charity and simple, Christmas kiddo fun
How I made it is very simple (it must be if I did it):

• A large frame (I spotted this one beside a dumpster the day before)
• Bakers twine (or any kind of string/yarn)
• Clothes pins
• Candy
• Fabric scraps - fold a big piece of fabric in half and cut out 24 little boxes (which will of course be 48 pieces of fabric since you had it folded in half) of varying sizes to look kind of random, sewed them on three sides extremely roughly (I did back stitch to ensure they withstand the ripping of candy out of them), then flip them right-side out so that the seam is on the inside. The tops aren't closed off, just pinned shut with the clothes pin. 

If you don’t like mine or have these materials already on hand, here are a few that I almost made which are equally cheap/easy looking: here, here, here, here.
I also found some adorable, cheap, medium sized envelopes at hobby lobby for just $3 for a pack of 12, which is what I almost did.
And here is just some more good inspiration.

The Scriptures:

I don’t know where exactly I received this scripture list, I just know that I walked out of Church holding this piece of paper that was titled “Scripture Advent”, on the same Sunday that I was going to finally sit down and make this Advent calendar I’d been daydreaming about during Church, and it just happened to include both scripture from the Bible and the Book of Mormon just as I’d dreamed, and it just happened to be all printed out so all I had to do was cut it up…so meant to be!
Never a better way to get a child to sit still than candy. So it works out kind of perfect to read the scripture while they eat their exciting new treat. 
December 1:  Isaiah 7:14
December 2:  2 Nephi 26:3
December 3:  Matthew 15:30
December 4:  2 Nephi 2:9
December 5:  3 Nephi 11:1-11
December 6:  Mark 16:5
December 7:  Moroni 7:28
December 8:  Luke 23:33-34
December 9:  1 Nephi 19:9
December 10:  2 Nephi 9:21
December 11:  Matthew 14:17-21
December 12:  3 Nephi 11:15
December 13:  John 13:34
December 14:  Matthew 20:30-34
December 15:  2 Nephi 2:26
December 16:  Matthew 4:23
December 17:  Luke 2:46-47
December 18:  Matthew 3:16
December 19:  2 Nephi 2:6
December 20:  Luke 2:8-11
December 21:  Matthew 1:21-23
December 22:  Helaman 14:2-4
December 23:  Helaman 14:5-8
December 24:  Luke 2:12-16

The Activities:

Many of these are specific to the area we live, but take a little time and do some Google searching to see what special memory making activities you can find in your area!
This list took a lot of thought on my part specifically for my kids and their ages right now. Many of them the toddler probably won’t be participating in as much, but will be valuable for my preschooler. 
It is a mix of fun outings, simple crafts, and charitable activities.
There are more than 24 here, so I have the option to skip on any that I don’t feel really fits into our schedule.
NOTE that I did not put these activities in the calendar baggies. I don’t want to feel like there is anything that I HAVE to do that I don’t WANT to do on a certain day, that would certainly add stress! So the kids THINK there are activities in every one, but really I just decide the night before which one I want to do tomorrow, and then sneak it in before I go to bed. Keep it as stress free as possible. Nobody is going to have a heartfelt, beautiful, best-childhood-memory moment if the day was just so busy that they didn’t have time to eat dinner or get rest of have down time to enjoy life.

Make it natural. Make your December full, but not busy.

• Get a Christmas Tree (cut our own at Elgin tree farm)
• Play in the Snow at the National Geographic snow event (Free-- Dec. 6, 3-6pm – 5206 Balcones Dr, Austin)
• Learn about and celebrate St.Nicholas Day (Dec. 6th – maybe get this book, do the wooden shoe thing with golden candy?? Watch Veggietales – St.Nicholas: A story of Joyful Giving?? Make Santa beards for ourselves out of cotton balls & wear with string around ears?? Make Santa hats out of paper?? Or a Santa Mask?? More ideas)
• Go on a hayride around the luminary festival (Wells Branch. Dec. 13th & 14th – pix with Santa & free hot chocolate)
• Go to Bethlehem (Free, 108 S. Vanderveer, Burnet, TX -- Dec. 6,7,8,13,14,15 6-9pm- arrive early not on Sat.)
• Go to a local Symphony Orchestra Christmas Concert (Free, Dec. 13th & 14th, 7:30pm -- Here for directions )
• Go to local Handbells concert (Free, Dec. 12th-16th, different times and locations, check here)
• Make & decorate cookies for Santa Claus (Dec. 23rd)
• Go ice skating in Fredericksburg
• Go ice skating on Whole Foods roof downtown
• Go for a horse drawn carriage ride at the Domain (Fri. & Sat. until Christmas, starting at 5:30. Make it a night & go to an early dinner at Maggiano’s)
• Go walk down 37th Street (directions)
• Go see the Zilker Trail of Lights (Dec. 8th-22nd. Pre-purchase shuttle tix at HEB for $3/per adult - shuttle locations)
• Get in PJs, bring hot chocolate, and drive through Rock’N’Lights (Old Settlers Park in Round Rock, 6-10pm)
• Go sing carols at a nursing home and bring homemade ornaments or small gift. Or do a Christmas storytime. (still working on this one, I am hoping to get a group of friends with small children together to do this with us)
• Donate some old toys to Operation Blue Santa
• Make chocolate dipped pretzels, wrap and keep in car to give away to homeless at stop lights
• Make wreaths and donate to Battered Women’s shelter
• Make & give treats & cards to neighbors
• Write a letter to Santa
• Make popcorn chain
• Make handprint tree (this)
• Make footprint reindeer (this)
• Make paper snowflakes (make extras for nursing home…if they turn out nice – Love this & this)
• Make salt dough ornaments (1/2 c. salt, 1/2 c. flour, 1/4 c. water – knead, make ornament, poke hole in top, bake @ 200 for 3 hours – make extras for nursing home)
• Make a snow-globe (hot glue, jar, fake snow, water)
• Make gingerbread houses
• Turn the fridge into a snowman (like this)
• Make a backdrop like on White Christmas (this, obviously)

*****Other festivities that I don’t think need to be on the Advent calendar to happen include*******

• Watch the Christmas Devotional on Dec. 8th 7pm CST (if you are only going to do ONE Christ centered thing as a family…do this one!)
• Preparing and performing a talent for the family on Christmas Eve. or Christmas Day
• Telling the nativity story in front of our fireplace fire on Christmas eve. (Felt board printable)
• Opening PJs and a new Christmas book on Christmas eve.
• Help kids make homemade gifts for the kids to give from themselves to their little friends
• Christmas storytimes at Barnes & Noble (Wednesdays @ 11am – Arboretum)
• Polar Express storytime at Barnes & Noble (Dec. 6th @ 7pm, wear pjs)
• See the lights at a super decked out home nearby (2207 Klattenhoff Dr., Austin, TX 78728)
• Christmas storytimes at our library (Wells Branch @10:30 & 11:15 on Mon & Fri)
• Movies to watch:
  -A Charlie Brown Christmas
  -It’s a wonderful life
  -White Christmas
  -A Chipmunk Christmas
  -Veggietales – St.Nicholas: A story of Joyful Giving
  -Elf
  -Chuck Jones’ original How the Grinch Stole Christmas
  -The Grinch
  -Miracle on 34th Street

*****Yet more festivities- these ones aren't on my priority list, but maybe someone reading this would be interested*******

• More Christmas Musical Performances - the more expensive ones (this Nutcracker Ballet Fri. & Sat. $15-$50, this Messiah Dec. 7th $20/ea, this Dec. 13th $20/ea, this Dec. 14th $25/ea)
• Lady Bird Johnson Luminations Holiday Light Event (free with 2 cans of food, dec. 14th & 15th, 6-9pm - frosty the snowman, caroling, crafts)
• Snow at the Hill Country Galleria in Bee Cave (Free, 12700 hill country blvd, bee cave, 78738 dec 7th & 21st. 12-4pm)
• Choral Concert at the capitol (free, Dec. 7th 12pm 1100 congress st. - choir info here)
• Its a Wonderful Life live radio show ($25 Thurs, Fri, Sat, Sun till dec. 22nd.-- more info) 
• Go to Follow The Star (walk/drive through/live nativity type of performance where you walk through 10 critical scenes from Christ's life -- cedar park - Dec. 5,6,7 from 6:30-9:30 free, bring nonperishable food items. Good Shepherd Lutheran, 700 W. Whitestone Blvd., Cedar Park, TX 78613)

Last year again. The Christmas Card picture that never made it onto a Christmas card. Ay. And yes, I’m starting to realize that Mike and I are always kissing in our family pictures while our kids are looking not at the camera. What can I say, we do what’s natural.

Edit: added a few more Austin events I came across!

A Happy Thought in The Midst Of...

 (last year)

Its been a rough week. Like, test who you really are kind of week. Like, if it don't kill ya, it will make you stronger kind of week. And I really believe those things, that when times are tough, one can take great pride in never losing a certain optimism. And when its over, when you overcame, when you look back with the knowledge that you actually smiled and enjoyed moments of the journey because you knew what a funny story it would be to look back on how laughably bad things were, that sense of accomplishment, that pride in yourself will move you up a few notches in the got-this-life-figure-out pole. And that kind of confidence boost is priceless. And when a person gots confidence, a person can do anything. 

I believe that life is like a muscle, lets imagine our life is a bicep. And if you want a stronger, more awesome bicep, you can't just go to the gym everyday for 10 years and lift 10 lbs for a half hour. The strength will remain the same, and it will be easy. You know what you gotta do, you have to increase the weight. You have to push your limits. Because right when it starts to burn. Right when you want to stop because it hurts so bad. THAT is the moment when you grow. 

In short, I truly am grateful for when life teaches me a lesson. I would never give up the rough times I've been through to make my life easier. Looking back at who I was five years ago, I can't believe how little I knew about life! This, is a journey. An Adventure. What adventure movie can you think of where everything went right and easy? (booooooooorrrring!)

I can't wait to see what kind of person I am ten years down the road, with ten more years of muscle-growin under the belt. 

Here is us last Christmas, after the most grueling 3 months of my life (I really think so). Moving from the west coast, leaving all of our friends who had become like family, ditching so many of our loved things that we couldn't bring along, to a scary new, lonely place, with no job. And look at how good things turned out! (I will not allow this week to taint the past year as we come upon our 1 year anniversary here!)

p.s.

To those who are aware of the plumbing incident, that was definitely the straw that prompted this post, but not the only straw on my back at the moment! Thankyou for everyone who has expressed their prayers and concern during this issue and during our flu sufferings! Love you all <3

For Me

I really do want to blog regularly.
But I get so caught up in getting caught up with pictures and cuteness of the kids that just MUST be documented and how-dare-I blog about “whatever” when I HAVEN’T . EVEN . POSTED . THOSE . HALLOWEEN . PICTURES . YET . !?!?!
BUT I have two quotes that keep ringing in my ears:

“DOUBT KILLS MORE DREAMS THAN FAILURE EVER WILL.”

and

“WHERE PERFORMANCE IS MEASURED, PERFORMANCE IMPROVES.”

I need to remember that a blog post doesn’t have to be perfectly worded, formatted, pictures processed to the perfect black and whiteness, DOUBT or fear that I don’t have time to make it PERFECT stop me ALL the time.
AND I think this blog would be a great place for me to talk about how I’m trying to be a better person and all that...
So I’m going to give this a shot, just blogging, for me.
Not blogging to show the world that I have the CUTEST kids ever made (which, ahem, I do…and umm I still will blog that…), and not blogging to declutter my hard drive by deleting pictures that aren’t good enough to make the blog cut, and not blogging to try and help others (I don’t even know how I’d do that anyways…), but just writing because I love to write and because I need to spend some time on me right now.
In general, I’m trying really hard to take more me time. As per my husband’s insistence.
I feel that I have made great progress in life lately. And its an amazing feeling. A big part of this was getting into running.
In the last three months I’ve gone from two extremes-

Who I was:

I hate running so much, but I know its good for me so I’m going to do it, I’m going to get all dressed in fun running clothes with my cool headphones, I’m pumped I’m so ready for this run!! And after running for 5 minutes I lay flat on the ground gasping for my life and I just let all the passersby assume that I just finished running a secret marathon. (I could really only run for about .20 miles)

Who I am now:

On days I don’t run, I’m an irritable Debbie downer. I crave a good run. I run 5k (3.10 miles) every day, no stopping to walk, a steady half hour every single time. Once a week I do an hour run, this usually gets me about 5.5miles. I’ve even gotten to the point that I can have a good chat with a friend while running!

What I’ve Learned

I’ve learned that when things get hard, like, really hard, you just gotta push through and it will get better. Have I been told that my whole life, uh, YEAH, but I thought that everybody was just saying that so that I’d keep trying! But guess what…its true!

At first it was literal – the route I run is slightly uphill for a small part. For a while I would run hard and stop right as I got to the top of the hill, thinking I deserved to rest now since I made it to the top! Makes sense right? Well one day I decided to keep running after I got to the top…wow! It was amazing! I pushed and pushed and made it to the top and then kept going!  And guess what…it got easier!! This simple, silly little hill on the path that runs past my house has taught me so much about life.

“The harder the battle, the sweeter the victory.”

The first time I ran the 5k loop without stopping, the accomplishment that I felt and the utter joy and self satisfaction ranks right up there with some of the happiest moments of my life.

And since I can’t bring myself to do a post without pictures, here are some strait from my phone- untouched! Most from Memorial Day weekend, some just from life lately.

A Better Me & A Movie

This year I have thought, and worked towards, my New Years resolutions more than ever in my life. I’ve concluded that there are two reasons for this:

1. I’ve finally come to the realization in my life that true happiness comes from personal growth.

2. I set uncomplicated, attainable goals (as if I hadn’t been told that this was the way for like, my whole life. doh)

I don’t really want to talk about all of the goals I’ve worked on, but I do want to talk about how I want to continue to move forward with 2013, and things that inspire me to be a better me.

When I’m working towards bettering myself in this way and that way, I’m usually focused on how being a better person will give me a happier day to day life. However I LOVE LOVE this talk by President Dieter F. Uchtdorf, which I’ve read at least five times now, which talks about bettering ourselves more with the purpose of not regretting anything at the end of our life.

“The more we devote ourselves to the pursuit of holiness and happiness, the less likely we will be on a path to regrets.”

Having regrets is painful. I for one do not want to be in the next life, watching the “Movie of Ariel’s Life” and be just totally disappointed that it is such a lame movie. Some things from his talk I especially love that I think will bring everyone greater happiness:

• Let ourselves relax, play, take it slow, with no excuses…

“Isn’t it true that we often get so busy? And, sad to say, we even wear our busyness as a badge of honor, as though being busy, by itself, was an accomplishment or sign of a superior life.”

• “Go swimming” in The Gospel of Jesus Christ…Let Heavenly Father help me become a better me…

“When it comes to living the gospel, we should not be like the boy who dipped his toe in the water and then claimed he went swimming. As sons and daughters of our Heavenly Father, we are capable of so much more. For that, good intentions are not enough. We must do. Even more important, we must become what Heavenly Father wants us to be.”

“As we do so, Heavenly Father will reveal to us things we never knew about ourselves. He will illuminate the path ahead and open our eyes to see our unknown and perhaps unimagined talents.”

• Be happy NOW, no matter what goal is just out of reach…

“So often we get caught up in the illusion that there is something just beyond our reach that would bring us happiness: a better family situation, a better financial situation, or the end of a challenging trial.

The older we get, the more we look back and realize that external circumstances don’t really matter or determine our happiness.
We do matter. We determine our happiness.
You and I are ultimately in charge of our own happiness.”
“…it’s not a race; it’s a journey. Enjoy the moment.”

I thought it was SO perfect that Mike and I stumbled upon one of our new favorite movies right after we moved to Austin, where we moved for the purpose of having a better, fuller, more relaxing life, where we would have more time to love our loved ones, and spend more time on things that matter.

So we moved for a better life, watched the movie Defending Your Life, then heard this talk by Pres. Uchtdorf. Coincidence? I think not.

I don’t want to give any spoilers, but go and watch this movie! I also don’t want to talk it up, because then you will be disappointed because I made it sound like the next Star Wars…... So it’s a totally lame movie…BOOORING…..meaningless….

Now go watch Defending Your Life, read this talk by pres. Uchtdorf again and again, and look at life differently. Go about life with meaning and pursue excellence.